Monday, October 3, 2011

Ups and Downs Of My Life

Lately my life hasn't been all rainbows and sunshine. I have been down a lot but things seem to be looking up now and boy am I ever grateful for that. Between my dad drinking and calling me drunk talking about ending his life to my mom pressuring me to get all A's in my class it hasn't been a picnic but things seem to be taking a turn for the better now. I hope it lasts. First and trying not to brag but my Hero, Idol, and Biggest Inspiration followed me on Twitter!!! That made my whole year!! I never thought in a million years that would happen and I have my Sweet, Amazing, fiance Rob to thank for that! I Love him with all of my heart! He has been there for me through everything lately and I appreciate it and him so much!!! I couldn't imagine my life without him. Alyssa followed me at a time I really needed it and I can't thank her enough!! I actually smiled again when that happened and my heart started pounding so fast I just couldn't believe it. As my whole year was being made something awful happened too. My best friend Liz and I got into a fight and I really thought I lost her for good that night and boy am I glad I didn't. She has been there for me through so much and I could never bare to lose her for good. I love you so much Liz! Some other people I am forever grateful for are Amy (@kat2338), Asu (@asu_juliette), Jen (@jennilly24), Lisa (@bittersweet9), and Mar (@lionandthelamb2). I couldn't picture my life without any of them. I am glad I have each and every one of them in my life. I wouldn't have been able to get through anything without them.

Sometimes I ask myself "Why can't everybody be like Alyssa?" I don't know why I sometimes ask myself that I guess I just like to imagine what the world would be like if everybody was as compassionate and loving as Alyssa. I usually only think about this when I am down and upset but I realize afterward that people are who they are and yes I do realize how random this is but just wanted to get the thought out. I'm glad there is only one Alyssa and nobody could ever replace her in my heart. Seeing her tweets on twitter puts the biggest smile on my face and her group hugs make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, those are the things along with being on webcam with Rob that make my life better when it all seems to be crumbling down. I Love you Alyssa, you make my heart and mouth smile!

My dad is an alcoholic and I know it is a disease but growing up was tough but I got through and am still getting through it. Yesterday he called me said he drank 7 beers and took 2 sleeping pills a few days ago and tripped over and extension cord and hurt his head and hand. Then he said something I never expected he said that was a huge wake up call for him and he took his pills and through them away and said he's not drinking anymore. I hope it sticks this time. He quit cold turkey once before and only made it 2-3 months but I have faith. Staying positive about everything is what I need to do and will try to do even when things get tough.

To close I would like to share my 3 dreams in life: 1. To be with my fiance Rob 2. To be a published writer and 3. To meet my hero, idol, and biggest inspiration Alyssa Milano! I do hope all 3 come true someday! Well that's it I guess. Sorry for rambling so much!

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